By Marguerite Rodger
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45 Conflict at School Despite your best efforts to manage your behaviors and take the very best care of yourself, conflicts can arise. Whether dealing with a bully, or a teacher who might not understand behaviors associated with ASD, conflict can be very stressful. If you or someone you know has an ASD, you may find that you need to advocate. This means that you may need to educate others so that they understand ASD and its symptoms. Try to do this in a calm and kind way. You can explain by telling them what ASD means, and that certain behaviors are symptoms of ASD.
I’m not prepared for the library, I haven’t finished reading my books! • Needs and wants: The menu at my favorite restaurant has changed. They don’t have my favorite dish anymore and, if I try something new, I might get sick. I don’t know how to explain this to the waitress, so I’ll have to wait until she guesses why I’m upset. This could take forever, and I’m starving! Not every kid with an ASD has difficulty expressing their emotions, but a lot do. Imagine not being able to ask for something you wanted, or have your opinion heard.
Some people find that sensory stimulation or distraction is a great tool. This means taking the focus off the stressful situation by using a distraction, such as a stress ball or toy, to calm down. Holding the object or toy while participating in a new or stressful situation can be comforting. Other times, “tuning out” may be the best option. Everything from music to video games to a favorite book can serve as a great escape from a stressful situation. Figuring out what works best might take a bit of trial and error.